Pokemon STOP App Launches for Lazy PokeMasters

Walking, Interacting With Other Humans No Longer Required

TOKYO: Gaming giant and Pokemon creators Nintendo announced today that they will be launching a new app targeted at Pokemon GO players who are too lazy to actually walk around. The new game Pokemon STOP will be the same game, except with no GPS locator – so it will not respond to the environment around you, nor require you to walk in order to play.

“The biggest criticism we’ve gotten so far from Pokemon GO players is that they’re tired from all the walking,” Nintendo CEO Tatsumi Kimishima said in a press conference, “Now, we have fixed this issue with our newest game Pokemon STOP!”

The game will also feature more dialogue and more Pokemon, though at the cost of less dynamic graphics. The game will not be available on smart phones, but on a device known as a “Nintendo Gameboy”. The “Gameboy” device features a Custom 8-bit Sharp LR35902 core at 4.19 MHz processor,  8 kB internal S-RAM, and a revolutionary black on green display.

Game-Boy-FL

Despite this, gamers are welcoming the decision.

“Man, I love Pokemon GO but I hate walking!” said 16-year-old gamer Brice Danvison, “This is gonna be soooo sick, though! I can play in class now!”

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